Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Columbus Day, 2007

These are notes from November, 1997.

Recently, on October 12, 2007, marked the 10th year anniversary of the death of John Denver. I heard about it on the way to work that morning. I caught the tail end of the announcement and did not hear the name of the artist but read the news story on the internet. The real thing that caught my eye was the name John Denver. I was a huge fan of his when I was growing up, in high school and later when I was working in Lake Tahoe. It was in Lake Tahoe where I met John Denver. It was a great experience. I was lucky to see him in concert only once. I remember leaving the concert in a state of euforia. I remember telling my friends that JD was the single most important creative and spiritual influence in my life. I believe that to this day. I did not keep in touch with John's music. I regret that. But diapers and baby food took priority. I felt as though I lost a great friend when he died.

I did not tell anyone at the time but with the death of Princess Diana, Mother Theresa, John Denver and Jacques Cousteau I feel that the powers that be in the universe must feel that we humans had things pretty well under control to leave us without these great humanitarians.

Anyway, I have shed my tears for John and now I am lifted by his music to another level. I am listening to his spirit when I hear his music. That gives me a link to the other side. I am happy and content.

Sunday, October 28, 2007

Wildfires

We were right in the middle of the San Diego wildfires last week. Yes. One is 15 miles to the north and another is about 12 miles to the south. The closests either one came to us was probably about 8 miles, as the crow flies.
We live in an old neighborhood, and the fires would have to go through a lot to get to us. The Santa Ana winds died down a few days ago and the fires are contained. They should be out sometime next week. I was called back to work on Wednesday morning last week. My wife had been going to work all week for half days. Most of the county has returned home after being evacuated. I have a mental list prepared about what to evacuate with but I kept it quiet just to let the kids feel a little at ease. My son had been on fall break the last two weeks prior to the fires and he has the rest of this past week off. My daughter had one week and it was extended to last week as well. They will have to make up that time lost.
County officials were trying to keep people off the roads. Many who were off went out to volunteer and help the evacuees. Except me, I can't handle the smoke. I have a little cough. Plus, I was recovering from my recent hospital stay. I was exhausted.
Santa Ana winds start with a high pressure system pushing down over the Great Basin (Utah, Nevada). That elevation is about 3000-4000 feet. As the high-pressure system, the air moves in a clockwise motion and it moves through the high desert. It picks up speed in the canyons and valleys and lowers in elevation. As air lowers in elevation it rises in temperature. About 4.5ºF for every 1000 feet. So by the time it reaches the coast (1000-ft. elevation) it can be 20ºF hotter and have 50 -60 mph behind it. The air is also desert air and extremely dry. We are in a drought and the dry air sucks any moisture out of the plants and vegetation. If there is a spark or anything the brush just goes up in flames. It is very volatile.
A Santa Ana condition is characterized by wind from the east. We had two fires, one to the north and one to the south. Our skies were clear, but warm. We had the dry heat but were spared by any fires and ash. Every once in a while we would get some smoke but our neighborhood was relatively clear. We lucked out. I know some of my coworkers had to be evacuated. I have not heard of any of them losing their houses. We kept an eye on the news but we were never in any danger. We would be concerned if there was one directly east of El Cajon, Santee, or Lakeside. There were several 4 years ago and we were really concerned then. But the fires we see there now quickly burn themselves out for a lack of fuel.
Four years ago, we were in the direct path of the flames and smoke. We were never in any real danger and did not evacuate. I did notice that we were at best 5 miles from the flames. We saw a lot of smoke and ash at that time. I went out to check on the yard and neighborhood and found, what looked like a burnt three-inch twig on the driveway behind my car. I bent over to pick it up and it disintegrated in my fingers. It turned completely to ash. That meant to me that it was on fire, an ember, when it hit my driveway. That is what the winds can do. It can carry a burning ember 5 miles and set it down on fire. We were very lucky that time as were we this time.
That is my take on the local wildfires. I count my blessings that we did not have to go through that nightmare. It has been said that the Lord never gives you any thing that you can’t handle. I have had a great life, with very little pain. I count my blessings. I sometimes think that God knows that I wouldn’t be able to handle anything like that. He is being easy on me. Thank God!
D.

Friday, October 26, 2007

Wake Up Calls

I set my alarm clock every day when I need the discipline to get going. That means I set my alarm every day when I need to go to work. We all need little reminders, little kicks in the butts, a little nudge to remind us of the things that we know need to be done. I need one everyday to get out of bed in the morning. I need a wake up call because otherwise I would just sleep for my own comfort.
A couple of weeks ago I received another wake up call. I went to a dinner party with some associates from work. My coworker and I were responsible for a huge four day presentation with our customers. The presentation went very well and we had a dinner planned for all participants. When we arrived at the restaurant all of the guests started ordering cocktails. I ordered one also.
I recently got out of the hospital for a bout of pancreatitis. One of the orders on release was to stay away from alcohol. For some reason I thought one little drink wouldn’t hurt. Well, it didn’t. Dinner was great, I think everyone had fun. It was a lot of food, nice flavor.
I drove home from the restaurant feeling quite well. The presentation had been going very well. The dinner went well. And there was no reason that the whole week would not conclude on a positive note. I got home about 9PM and sat down to talk to my wife and watch some television before going to bed.
By 10:30 PM I could not get comfortable. I had an inkling as to what the pain was. I had the experience before. I thought getting a good nights sleep would make me feel better but by 2 o’clock in the morning the pain would not go away. And by 5:00 AM I was in the emergency room. My pancreas was inflamed and irritated and it had shut down my intestines causing me excruciating pain. Once I was admitted to the hospital I called my coworker to let him know that I would not be in to work that day.
Luckily, the work that I had done on the project was the work that made it possible to be taken over by the customers. That was the purpose - to show the customers that they could do it. The presentation was destined to be a success whether I was there or not. But I would have liked to have seen the presentation through to the end.
I missed 7 days of work but I was too weak to do anything. I needed the time to recuperate. I was given a few more days when I returned to work. I went to work on Monday but, living and working in San Diego County, they sent us home. We returned on Wednesday.
Well, that hospital stay was my wake up call. The illness and the recent fires tell me that I need to be healthy to take care of my family. They need me around. I need to be here for them. I need to take better care of my health. I spent 5 days in the hospital and really put a lot of pressure on those who care about me. I think I know what needs to be done now. I am losing weight and feeling a lot more in control of my life.

Pay attention to your wake up calls. They are important.

Wednesday, October 17, 2007

responsibility

Haven’t written much lately. I have been too tired. I started this blog about a month ago and I mentioned that I had some minor health problems that I am dealing with. Well, those health problems this past week landed me in the hospital for a minor five days. I was on an IV for three of those days. Unfortunately, I was on pain killing drugs so it was not a real great time for "pondering". I reached no great conclusions from this tremendous opportunity of introspection. The great revelation that came from this stay in the hospital was the knowledge that I need to take better control of my health. When this whole thing is over, I will have missed about 7 days of work, caused my family unbelievable amounts of pain and fear and I have nothing to show for it.
I can say that I have the knowledge that I have to do a better job of taking care of my health. I have too many reasons to live and too many people depend on me. And I can’t go around scaring them like this. I take full responsibility.

Friday, October 5, 2007

Begin

"Don't be afraid that your life will end,
be afraid that it will never begin."

I received an e-mail tonight from a dear friend. It was one of those chain e-mails that contains a pretty picture and some inspirational saying that is meant to inspire or provoke thought or give you warm fuzzies for the sender. All of that happened to me. It was a beautiful picture. And the little story was effective enough. The quote at the end is the quote that I led this entry with -- "Don't be afraid that your life will end/be afraid that it will never begin." That is the sum of why I am doing this.

My children are growing up. They are becoming more independent every day. My daughter is working and my son is getting smarter all the time. I see them growing into productive citizens. I see them following their dreams. I just thought I would start to follow mine. To quote Goethe, "Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it. ."

My dream was to be a writer. So here I am. I have had millions of thoughts over the years. Most of those we won't talk about here. We can forget them. But a great many of them define who I am as a person today. I still have ideas for books, for novels, and I write notes everyday for poems that never seem to go anywhere but what I really want to do is be a columnist. To have a weekly column in a newspaper or magazine would be sooo cool. So I am here. Plugging away. Maybe some day I will get lucky, or, again, as I said in an earlier post, I am just here creating my own luck.

So, thank you to all who come here to read these words. For every new tick on the tally, I find encouragement. You are helping someone follow his dream. You are helping me down the road of life. We will see where this all leads. Be bold in your lives. Follow your dream.

D.

Wednesday, October 3, 2007

Draft

I worked today. I write technical manuals for aircraft components. I had one such manual on my desk in my cubicle this morning. The manual was a review draft that was about to be sent to its final review.

My cube mate is a retired airline pilot, 78 years old and working part time to keep his mind active. He looked at the manual on my desk and saw the "draft" written on it and said he hated that word. I asked him why since he had a sweater on and it wasn’t drafty in the office at all. Draft is one of those words with many different meanings. To be "drafted" to the army; to "draft" a document; or a "draft" as in breeze. He said that he was drafted once. I didn’t press it any further but I knew what he meant. Jim can be a talker and at times it makes it difficult to get things done. So I let him go get his coffee. He is a good guy though and it is a pleasure having him as a cube mate. Plus, he only works part time so most of the time that I am there, he is not.

When he mentioned about the draft I started thinking about when I was a kid. I was in high school during the Vietnam War. I graduated high school in 1976. The war was over, or at least the US involvement was, a year before I graduated. There was no selective service requirement at the time. I was at the end of the baby boomer generation and I fell into the mid years - post draft and pre-selective service. I was never asked. I have often thought about what I would have done if I had been drafted. I was a shy, timid kid and probably would have done what was expected, done what I was told. I would have served…and been scared to death the whole time.

But I was really scared for my older brother. We have never talked about the draft or selective service. Probably, because it was all over when we graduated from school. Honestly, it never came up. As I am older now, and hopefully wiser, I realize that I missed out. The service would have been a great experience for me. I should have signed up. But, at 17, I didn’t know what the hell I was doing. I went to college and hid from life.

I serve my country now by being gainfully employed and paying taxes on what I earn. I spend most of my money and when I do that I pay taxes on what I spend. And I educate myself before elections. I vote my conscience. I try to vote for what is right. But given the primary system, sometimes I am forced to vote for what is left. I try to serve my country as well as I know how.

I am proud to be an American. And I will stand up for freedom and liberty as long as I live. I am proud of those who serve and they are better men than I am I salute them and thank them for their sacrifice and service.

Tuesday, October 2, 2007

Discussions

When I started this Blog I had all kinds of grand dreams. I thought that I would write thought provoking little essays here that would really provoke a lot of discussion on the life we lead. I have received some great comments and found links to some interesting people, but I am still waiting for those deep philosophical and intellectual follow-on discussions. Heck, I have only been at this a week now. But still, all of my friends who have checked out the site, AND all of my new friends, drop me an e-mail if you don't want to comment here. I would love to hear from you. Especially now that my team was so ungloriously eliminated from the baseball playoffs, I have plenty of time for long discussions. So, whenever you are ready, whatever you want to talk about.

Thanks for stopping by.

Punny

This actually happened several years ago, but no one wanted to hear it.

In our office everyone at break time takes walks in the parking lot. It helps keep the blood flowing through the day. One day my friend, Tom, and I were walking. About one hundred yards away I saw his car parked under a tree. I asked him if he left his window down. He said he didn't think so but he'd better check. Break was just about over so as he went to check I went back to my desk. Several minutes later, Tom came back to the office.
"Did you leave the window down?" I asked.
"No, it just looked down," Tom replied.
"Well, I hope you did something to cheer it up."
"Yes, I juggled some balls and told some jokes."
"Oh, a real 'glass' act," I said.
"Hey, that's funny. You can go to a comedy club and 'win dough'," Tom countered
"Naw, they'd see right through it," I replied.

Monday, October 1, 2007

Life is Wonderful

More Baseball stuff. Going through my notes again and I found another story from my son’s early baseball years. This was sometime around the spring of 2002.

My wife, Nora was busy one particular Saturday morning and it was up to me to watch Timmy, almost 7, and keep him busy. I failed at that. I gave him a baseball bat and told him to go outside and swing it to build his muscles. Katie went camping with the girl scouts. Poor Timmy was bored all morning. I fixed him lunch and then he looked over my shoulder as I worked on the computer. He wanted to play his Toy Story game but it needed to be re-installed. It kept giving me an error and besides I was trying to get the new computer set up. I was going on only four hours of sleep. I am afraid I was a little abrupt with him. I went to take a nap. This gives you a glimpse of my tremendous parenting skills.

Got him to his bball game just in time. My mom and dad came out to watch him play and that was nice. He got a hit off of live pitching and made another assist from the outfield. But that isn't all, his game went to about 5:30 and we needed to get ready for the Padres game that evening. We got there at the middle of the first inning. We sat down in our seats and Timmy noticed something for the first time.

"Dad, look, the Padres have base coaches just like we do."

I was impressed. He had not noticed that before. I turned to him and told him that since his team isn't using the pitching machine anymore that he is playing the same game as the major leaguers. From that point on he seemed really tuned in to the game. You know, as much as a soon to be 7 year old can be.

During the game when he got tired, he climbed up onto his mom's lap. She held him there for awhile. I looked at her with the look of "you know we paid for that seat" and she told me that she may not get to do that much longer. I nodded. He is growing up. You know what I am talking about. Time is precious.

I was up till two AM that night, reading, writing, and listening to music. I wrote a poem. This was around the time that Country Song, "I hope you Dance" was popular. I had a lot of feelings going on that night. My daughter was growing up, my son doing the same, and I was remembering the old times. This was the poem I came up with that evening in April, 2002.

"On occasions I have danced
and swayed to the music of love
And many times I have chanced
upon a delightful thought of us
But time, my old foe, barges in
to tread upon my heart.
Dances and chances become dim
and memories fade to dark. "
C. 2002, David Normand

I hope you like it. I was thinking about my kids, memories and watching them grow. I realized that time has stolen memories from me. I was listening to a lot of old music and I guess this poem can be read a few different ways. But overall, I like the sentiment. Life is too short. Enjoy what you have.